No Breaks Please

As we were repeatedly informed by the brainless fucktards on BRMB (one of our two equally awful tip-pot local radio stations, the other being Heart) it was (still is) “colder than Iceland!” tonight. Give a moron a phrase like that and they’re going to run with it, more’s the pity. I somehow doubt in Iceland their broadcasting idiots are chortling about how the weather tonight is “warmer than Birmingham!”

But even in these Icelandic (!) conditions I was standing outside the depot having a fag in my t-shirt, for that is how hard I am right now. Oh yes. Today the blokes scanning and throwing the boxes onto the conveyor belt were working kinda slowly it seemed to me and I was getting well narked. We’ve been finishing early every day since me and the Polish guy teamed up in the back of the lorry and I don’t think that’s a coincidence for we rock. Bring it on, I said, but the trickle remained and after three hours they stopped for a break! You what? We don’t have breaks here – we go home early! So the Pole grabbed a scanner and we carried on without them, the rubes.

I mean, a break? You don’t need a break! Just go and have a fag and cup of tea for five minutes.

Breaks… tchh…

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3 Responses to No Breaks Please

  1. Gordon says:

    Ummm isn’t having a fag and a cup of tea classed as a “break”?

    (this is from an office worked who HATES the smokers as they waste about an hour each day on ‘fag breaks’ which are pretty much ignored by management but I don’t want to rant here so … umm.. I’ll shut up)

  2. Pete Ashton says:

    A “break” in this context is spending half an hour in the staff room watching some godawful sitcom on TV.

    (I’ve always said that non-smokers should take fag breaks. Five minutes standing outside is a good thing and probably increases productivity in the long run (or some shit)).

  3. Ben says:

    Off-topic, but cheers for nominating my ‘England’s Dreaming’ post for the TD Post Of The Week – much appreciated!