So I’m back at the Tampon factory on the late shift for another week, which was a bit of a surprise. I would have thought not turning up for work and not phoning in would have made them refuse to take me but it seems I wasn’t trying hard enough. Despite even turing up 10 minutes late today (not deliberate at all – bus issues) all I got was a “feeling better then?” Turns out there was a guy there who actually wanted my job and who had jumped at the chance to cover for me, but an hour in he walked off the site never to return.
Today was actually not too bad. Having realised that a number of people there are pretty incompetent I started slowing down and slacking off and it made a big difference. I think I was tuning in to the rhythm of the machines or something which is not good. I heard somewhere (I think it from Sam’s mum (hi Sam’s mum!) via Sam) that Ozzy Ozborne was working in a factory and listening to the repetitive chunks of the machinery inspired him to ‘invent’ heavy metal. Today I thought the tedious tin-pot local radio station was playing Ballroom Blitz by Sweet, which would have been almost revolutionary for them, but it was just a tampon making machine going chunka-chunka at the right pitch with the news in the background.
And I find I have very little to write about. I think I’ll have to quit this job for the sake of my blog. Thankfully Kat at the agency has agreed that I won’t be working here after this week – there’s no way I’m doing the 6.00am start again, at least not two busses away.
Anyone got a question about how a tampon factory works? It all seems very tedious to me but then I’ve been doing it for a while now. Actually, I have a question. Does anyone actually use an applicator? I’ve never known a lady who does but a hell of a lot seem to be sold. Is it just that some women don’t like sticking their fingers up there or is there some more sensible reason for them?
Yeesh, do you really want to know this? I suppose that you do. I’ll try to keep the language as delicate as possible.
While delicacy is a motivator for some people, others find getting the angle tricky without the help of the length of the applicator. So applicator tampons are kind of the “training” tampon .. but the reason people carry on using them may be that their shape is different to non-applicator tampons — longer, looser and less plug-like. There’s an advert which shows the difference, or used to be — the one where they turn the test-tubes upside down? So, it’s what’s comfortable for you.
Word from the girls’ boarding house is; we had to get *very* bored before we started discussing this sort of stuff.
Hi Pete! So tampons get made in a factory?!! I guess iknew they had to come from some where. What exactly does one do in tampon factory? I liked your Ozzy story about inventing heavy metal, it would seem more true if he were a kraut rocker but. Reminds me of the summer i spent working in a computer hard drive factory…the part i worked in was actually called ‘the grind’! I used to go do-lally on the night shifts,laughing at my own zombie impersonations…
Its a hard life. Hope you get a new job soon.
Fred :)
I’ve heard of the” Ozzie invented heavy metal in a factory” story as well but it might have been from Sam when she was in Houston last year. We had an interesting discussion about just how many famous musicians started out in Brum. My guess is that the industrial sounds of the West Midlands may have been instrumental in generating a lot of beat over the years. Not just Ozzie.
Jeremy: I figured it was something like that. It just struck me as odd that I’ve never seen a pack in a female friend’s bathroom.
Fred: Milk comes from cows, too. ;) As far as I can tell (I’m not working in that area) the tampons are made from a loose cottony type material which is rolled and compressed in a massive machine full of cogs and wheels and pushy-shovey things, popping out the end all wrapped in plastic – no human handling at all. You’ll be pleased to know they go through a metal detector as well as the usual random quality checks. It makes a hell of a noise and looks incredibly old fashioned with dust everywhere (from the material as it makes its way into the machine) and a rather strange, but not offensive, smell. Kinda warm-sterile.
> It just struck me as odd that I’ve never seen a pack in a female friend’s bathroom.
They’re cheaper, leak less, and you can go longer between finding a bathroom.
Or maybe we’re all just indelicate.
Uh, you obviously missed them in your own bathroom as well… ;)
I’m seeing them, and remembering having seen them, everywhere now. I think it was a selective blindness thing, or recent over-exposure has led to my actually noticing and being interested in them. This will pass.
what up with the tampon thing? can’t we just leave it to beaver?