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My Xmas card to you all:

How to Shop in a Music/Video Store Without Being a Shitfuck

Ay men

Yes, been quiet again. Well, it is December and I do work in a shop.

Don’t expect much if anything on these pages for the next few weeks. I’m going to be too busy until Xmas and then have some time off the computer until New Year hopefully coming back refreshed and ready for new challenges and all that. Same goes for email - I’ll only deal with urgent and/or easy ones. And then only every few days.

Have a good one, especially if you deserve it. And if you have a crap one, don’t worry. It don’t mean bollocks at the end of the day. And if you’re working over Xmas, enjoy your January break.

Weird-assed syncronicity strikes as per usual. Damn you Robert Anton Wilson! A couple of days ago Kate was going through the box of A6 mincomics looking for stuff to read and she stumbled across my leaving book thing from Secondary school which all your chums sign in. You know the deal. I hadn’t seen it for ages and got really weirded out not so much that it was there but that she was looking at it. And I don’t know why that is. And now, looking at it this moment, I see Daniel Bridge, who I decided to contact via the FU site and who replied within a couple of hours, signed on the very first page.

Months ago I heard about this Friends Reunited fandango and without thinking put my name on it. There were about 5 names from my year and no-one I knew. Saw all the hype but didn’t think about having another look until Kate was persuaded to by an old school chum of hers. So I had a look and encouraged Kate to have that Bath she’d just run for as long as possible. There are about 20 people who’s name’s I can put faces to on the list now, and more that sound familiar. One chap, Daniel Bridge, I remembered as being a more level headed friend and his little entry looked like he hadn’t turned into a tedious plank, so I bit the bullet and paid the £5.00. It must be an age thing. I’ve been thinking about school days a bit, wondering if by going through those rather confused and naive (and I was very confused as naive as a child) days might reveal some useful information. And so Daniel (or Danny as I remember, but he’ll remember me as Peter) emails back within a couple of hours. Turns out he was in the pub with another old school chum, Craig Gardiner, a few days ago and my name came up. I’ve suggested meeting up middle of January.

It should be good. Croydon, where spent my teenage years, produces one of two kinds of people. Either you go down the straight path and get a job in an office or you go off the rails slightly, either mentally of physically, and do something interesting. There was a huge punk scene in Croydon in the 70s and David Bowie came from neighbouring Bromley. I decided I was a communist at the age of 14. It was Croydon - you had to do something or else you’d go mad.

I suspect my old school chums, those who were of the right ilk, went down this path and have continued. Should, as I say, be good.

20th Jan? Watch this space.

It appears that rather a lot of people I know, self included, are having something of a tough time of it at the moment. I have a nice holiday to look forward to in under a fortnight. The rest of you I hope have something similar. The arse-end of 2001 is proving just that - arse.

Hang in there.

People who collect AOL disks: “I enjoy collecting AOL and other ISP disk / CD’s. I’m not sure why I collect them and I take a lot of flack from people over this hobby.”

Feature on Wired details it all with a straight face.

Just doing my bit and linking to KPMG. For those not in the know, Wired spell it out. In brief, UK blogger Tom and others have brought it to our attention that KGPM (or whatever) don’t want people linking to them without permission. Aparently a major impetus for this dunderheaded move was someone linking to their Theme Song, a 4.30 minute long song called Vision of Global Strategy. The lyrics go: “KPMG/We’re strong as can be/A dream of power and energy/We go for the goal/Together we hold/On to our vision of global strategy…”

If they weren’t one of the largest financial companies in the world it’s be funny.

King Missile are rather good…

Take stuff from work.
It’s the best way to feel better about your job.
Never buy pens or pencils or paper.
Take ‘em from work.
Rubber bands, paper clips, memo pads, folders-take ‘em from work.
It’s the best way to feel better about your low pay and appalling working conditions.
Take an ashtray-they got plenty.
Take coat hangers.
Take a, take a trash can.
Why buy a file cabinet?
Why buy a phone?
Why buy a personal computer or word processor?
Take ‘em from work.
I took a whole desk from the last place I worked.
They never noticed and it looks great in my apartment.
Take an electric pencil sharpener.
Take a case of white-out; you might need it one day.
Take some from work
It’s your duty as an oppressed worker to steal from your exploiters.
It’s gonna be an outstanding day.
Take stuff from work.
And goof off on the company time.
I wrote this at work.
They’re paying me to write about stuff I steal from them.
Life is good.

Ew…

If I were a work of art, I would be M. C. Escher’s Lizards. I am a bizarre juxtaposition of the real and the unreal. Based in the realm of mathematics, my two-dimensional appearance belies a complex and free-willed behaviour which both delights and confuses people. Which work of art would you be? The Art Test